Febru-Eris: Busy-ness, breakdowns and forgotten memories of the 90’s.

I haven’t been on Facebook. I haven’t been on my own message boards. There is a lot going on.

As I write, Cootie is taking down the Jolly Roger from the living room wall. We have bins packed. The living room is partially in bins and boxes. We are moving into our new house March 6th.

This is good. This is coming up fast. Holy shit.

The Mogwai, who has realized that switching schools again is not going to be easy, is cranky. I think behind her eyes are little breakdowns, happening at the speed of teenager, wondering if she’s going to be able to adapt to a new social environment, a new neighborhood and a new full-time sibling.

I am having nightmares about work. I am making phone calls and arrangements and keeping an ever-changing list of logistics in my head. When? Where? Who? What the fuck? I am feeling the stress of things. This is evidenced by the fact that I have cried at least once a night every night this week. Really? Please, place my ovaries in a diaper.

And out of nowhere, I hear this song. Actually, I hear a Jesse Lacey cover of the song, “Accident Prone” by Jawbreaker. I don’t ever remember hearing this song ever before but somewhere, in a very dark part of my head, I know that I am supposed to remember it. In fact, I am supposed to have a memory associated with that song. I don’t know what it is. And now the song is fucking with me.

We move in a week. Things are weird. I am dealing as well as I can.

I’ve been in far worse situations. At least it’s only nightmares and an old Jawbreaker song.


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