An update. Two requests. And something that fits nowhere else.

My last blog entry, “Porch Monkey 4 Life,” spawned a small-scale revolution among the people who read it and took it to heart. More people took it to heart than I ever thought would. Writing it was a cathartic experience, meaning I stood on the back porch for about half an hour, chain-smoking, working through my own shit after I had written it.

The next day, I heard from no less than ten people on Facebook, Twitter and right here on WordPress who had something that they wanted to take back. One of my friends took back her sexuality and got laid that very night, after a ten-month dry spell. I was so pleased for and proud of her. Another friend decided to take back her self-confidence and it was immediately apparent, even through her Tweets, that it took. And others reported music they were taking back, or movies they were reclaiming as their own… I, of course, took back Hot Springs, NC, with my Cootie on a day that can only be described as the happiest day of my Life.

I am not a motivational speaker,  by any stretch. But I am pleased that my little blog entry was able to inspire people that I love and respect to take back aspects of their Lives that they had, conciously or unconciously, given away. To me, that’s just doing the Work. That is intent made manifest. And that pleases me.

I don’t mean to sound egotistical here. I feel far from egotistical. Honored and humbled, but not egotistical.  But if that last blog post I put up spurred you into action and allowed you to take back something that is/was yours, please let me know. If you Tweet me (you can find me as Barbelith77 on Twitter), please put “#porchmonkey4life” as your hashtag.

In my dreams, I see myself on Oprah explaining the social and emotional revolution that is the Porch Monkeys. Mostly, I want to hear Oprah use the phrase “porch monkey” and have to like it.

My second request is just for fun. Pretty much everyone who shows up at the wedding will be Tweeting and Twitpic-ing the whole thing. Because that’s a hoot. So let’s make #XandCootieswedding a trending topic. Why not?

Finally, after the wedding on Saturday, you will not hear me use the word “step-daughter” again. I have no felt that being someone’s bio-parent gave you any more claim on a child than being married to that person’s bio-parent. Having a “step” child seems derogatory and, in my thinking, denigrates the extent of the relationship. I mean no disrespect for her bio-father by any stretch. And it is really a minor chink in the semantics.

But I love her like she were my own.

And I will call her my daughter, because that is how I feel.


2 thoughts on “An update. Two requests. And something that fits nowhere else.

  1. Amen to that.

    Sierra is my daughter. I jumped right into the parenthood covered wagon when I met My Lady and her — so that’s how I feel about it. Seth is her brother, not half-brother or step-brother …
    Family is family, and although I’m not close to some of my blood relations (okay, most of my blood relations) – I’ll claim them all equally. The four older brothers from dad’s first marriage, the “admitted” son from the time between his first marriage and his marriage to my mom, and the assorted other brothers and sisters I’ve managed to find about about from the whole 50 year span of time that he was apparently actively fathering children – whether he admits them or not — some of them resemble him too strongly for their father to be anyone else. What I’m saying is, they are all family, and I don’t choose to cheapen that relationship by adding a half- or a step- tag to it.

    and though it doesn’t matter; I’m proud as hell of you for not doing it either.

  2. Thank you, Ky.
    It’s a Package Deal. And if you can’t handle the Package Deal, then you have no right being in the relationship. I’ve been so happy with how Cootie has handled my Package Deal… repaying her in kind is the least I can do.
    That… and the fact that I want to do it. I love Mogwai. She is a sweet, wonderful soul and I see it as my duty to nurture, support and teach her as she goes along.
    I have never thought of Sierra as anything but your daughter, even though I know, in a biological sense, she is not.
    Bio doesn’t matter.
    Parenthood never relied on blood as much as the courts say it does.

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