So… it’s homemade pizza for dinner, and I’ve already fucked it up. The dough for the crust is so wet, I’m about to pour in some Sakrete just to get it to the right consistency. Whatever dough is left will go into a post hole so that I may install a mailbox.
I’m not terribly worried, though. There’s a workaround. There’s usually a workaround for everything.
Except maybe… maybe… the passing of linear time.
It already feels like Fall and as we watch the Wheel of the Year turn, more signs pop up every day that Summer is over and Fall has taken its rightful place as Reaper of the Sun. Both of the kids are already in school, and Cootiebug starts her classes tonight. One thing we’re excited about as far as her schooling goes is that she’s taking German. I’m going to try to learn it along with her. That way, we can talk about private things in German even with Mogwai (Cootie’s daughter, so nicknamed for her hatred of bright light) on the couch. Plus, everything you say in German just sounds raunchy. You could ask where the bathroom is in German and it sounds like you just asked a Salvation Army bellringer if her mother likes anal.
I have it from a very respectable source that mums are already out at local greenhouses. I do like mums. Soon, the pumpkins will be out and I will be buying candy that is allegedly for trick-or-treaters, but it’s really for me. We all know it. I’ll be watching shitty horror movies on the couch and eating Fun Size Milky Ways. The costumed kiddies get Double Bubble. If their teeth don’t shatter on the initial bitedown, that’s a tasty treat.
October is my favorite month of the year. The Boy (my son) has his birthday that month. We celebrate Samhain. And this year, October will mark the date that Cootie and I actually realized what we were to each other. And we will mark that time with our Handfasting.
With very little exception, this has been a fantastic year. Perhaps the best one of my entire life.
I know those of you who have read me in the past were waiting for something more bitter and cynical. Sorry to disappoint. That’s not to say that won’t pop up at some time in the future, but I’m not that person 24/7/365 like I used to be. Like I always used to be. It’s taken me forty years to get to a point where I didn’t care if I lived or died. It’s still weird for me. I find myself slipping into old habits, old thought patterns. But it doesn’t take me long to catch myself.
Optimism is hard work. But I’m finding it worth the effort.
And even as we look forward into Fall, where we literally can sit back and watch the world die, I find myself spying signs of life everywhere, even in places where I thought I had scorched and salted the Earth.
Is your insulin level up yet? Mine is. I need a drink. And I need to check on that pizza dough. For all I know, it’s become self-aware and is trying to take over the kitchen with its yeasty evil.